That Mom on White Lotus is Definitely Perimenopausal
The signs are all there if you know where to look
Spoiler Alert: I don’t think I’m going to spoil too much about the show’s third season, but I want to pop this spoiler alert up top just in case… If you don’t want to know anything about the show until you’ve watched it, stop reading now.
When you’re perimenopausal, you can spot your people in the wild. In a glance you can discern a woman’s age, hormone status, and level of suffering. I see you, gals.
It happens a lot in grocery store lines, dressing rooms, and hair salons—just about anywhere women collect out of the earshot of men, especially places our temperature regulation is put to the test. (Why do hot flashes always plague us in grocery store lines?)
But just the other day, I happened to notice it on TV.
Parker Posy plays Victoria Ratliff, a southern socialite on a family holiday in Thailand. I think Parker plays her perfectly. You can’t quite figure Victoria out. Or maybe you can or think you can, but will the end of the season have you feeling the same way about her? It remains to be seen, and this is one of the things that keeps me tuning in.
But, that woman is definitely perimenopausal. And here’s why I’m sure:
For starters, she’s always in loose, flowy clothes. If I had to guess, it’s because she feels bloated and uncomfortable in anything with a button. Same, girl, same.
She talks loud and slow, which is probably to overcome the tinnitus she’s suffering—a ridiculous symptom of perimenopause no one warns us about.
She can’t sleep for shit. Her lorazepam is her bestie. When she loses it (or…ahem…it’s swiped), she announces she’ll now have to drink herself to sleep. If you don’t have trouble falling asleep throughout perimenopause, you’re probably not in perimenopause.
She struggles to maintain her body temperature. She’s too ladylike to burst into the soaking face sweats I have personally experienced in public, but we can tell from her handy use of a parasol that she’s trying to both stay in the shade and cool as a cucumber.
Her brain is foggy as hell. When Piper announces her plans, Victoria exclaims, “You want to move to Taiwan!” Victoria, sweetie, we’re in Thailand. It’s not her fault. Her peri brain wouldn’t pull Thailand from the memory banks so it gave her another T word. Admit it, you’ve been there.
So, I’d just like to take a moment to appreciate the inclusion of perimenopausal women in cultural discourse. Seeing them on the screen makes me feel validated and better understood.
No, no it actually doesn’t.
Because she’s not seen slathering hormone creams on her nether regions or pulling clumps of hair out of the shower drain. That would make me feel a little more seen. How ‘bout you?
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I can spot a fellow perimeno/meno chick a mile away! And I'm sure/hopeful they can spot me too. We're in this together!
Oh my gosh.. I hadn’t thought about it but you totally called it! And also love that it isn’t even a thing on the show - which almost normalizes it. Wonder if Mike White was aware he was creating a character in perimenopause.